Engaging in Empathy — grateful soul

This next post builds upon the idea of not just being conscious of things, but also acting with feeling and intention. The other day it hit me that one of the key components that leads to a happier, smoother life is the ability to consider the feelings of others.

The human race is a species that thrives off of connections with others. We run our best when we are surrounded by love, care, humor, and joy, all of which work as a give-and-take cycle that can only be made possible with other people. With this in mind, if we go out into the world and only act with the attitude of “what’s best for myself,” we can cause harm to our cycle of reciprocation and begin to push away the people who provide us with what we truly want and need in life. We often forget to take a step back and reflect on the potential outcomes of our actions, not only for our personal sake, but also in a way that takes into account the effect we may have on someone else. I am sure that for many of us, the last thing we would want to do is to hurt someone, let alone someone who is close to us. That’s why, it is important to ask ourselves before doing something that could have a ripple effect onto another’s life:

“Will my actions affect someone other than myself?”
“Am I willing to take the risk and potentially, knowingly hurt someone?”
“If my actions do end up harming someone, will I regret it? Is this person’s suffering worth what I am about to do?”

Essentially, it is important to weigh out the potential benefits and potential consequences of the things we do and say. This is important to do even in situations that may have virtually no effect on others, because it is important to always be conscious of how our actions and words will influence the next step or moment within our life paths.

Considering others’ feelings goes further than it’s immediate benefit (because caring about others is SO positive), but it also can help in finding appreciation in your own life. For example, if you close your eyes and truly imagine what it might be like to live in a country where health care was not accessible or you had to walk miles to get drinkable water, you might be able to actually feel the intensity of real people’s situations. Imagining what they must go through, things like being exposed to sweltering heat, yet physically pushing themselves, or showing up to work each day despite battling the worsening symptoms of a serious health condition, can put our own lives into perspective. Compassion and empathy don’t have to go as extreme as considering the conditions of another country. It can be as simple as knowing that a neighbor down the street is dealing with a tragedy, becoming conscious of how they must feel, and then possibly going out of your way to show them the love and care that exists in all of us.

This brings me to another point, which is that through empathy, we act in a way that is positively perceived by others since they feel our care and kindheartedness. When others feel you exuding such lovingness, they too will act in a way of compassion towards you, refueling that cycle that I touched upon earlier. We should keep in mind though that the ultimate goal of acting empathetically is not to receive anything in return, as being selfless in and of itself is beneficial for the soul. Basically, when we think of other people’s situations, we should treat them in a way that we would hope to be treated if we were in the same situation, because later on when it’s our turn to be on the receiving end, our considerations will be reciprocated.

The moral of the story is that without empathy we cannot reach our highest potential. We need others in our life to help us live fully and experience the essence of life, and to do our best at maintaining such relationships, we must act from a place of love. We must act in a way that considers how those around us might be feeling, so that we can therefore do our best to align our words and actions in a way that will get others to a place of more love and joy, rather than of pain and suffering. Sometimes we make mistakes, and just because we may hurt someone near to us, does not necessarily mean that they will immediately stop showing the care and love they have for us. However, over time, if we continue to ignore the feelings of others and act in selfish ways that harm those around us, they may begin to pull away and shelter their tenderness for us.

The next time you hear of someone else’s situation or go to do something that you know will have an effect beyond yourself, take a moment and think of the emotions one might feel in response. Do your best to fulfill your own happiness, but try to lessen its expense on other’s happiness. Reach out and express your empathy whenever it is possible. As we journey closer to our own happiness, we must not forget about the value of the happiness of others.