Compounding Change

May 16, 2020 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Amidst these unique times, change has become obvious. We see differences in the way we navigate everyday activities, and modes of adaptation are at the top of the agenda as we discuss what our post-pandemic future may look like. As we continue to learn how to cope with the ever-evolving situation that our world is battling, we are also still experiencing the inevitable trials of human life that have always existed. Personally, I find myself dealing with immense feelings of change as I graduate college and attempt to transition into a new phase of life during this universal uncertainty.

I am grappling with the reality that this current position is not what I had visualized for myself when I dreamt of becoming an official Berkeley graduate. The long-term planner in me had assumed that logically my first step in the real world would be to place my foot in the door of a stable career. After spending months preparing for dream opportunities, my prospects dissolved given the economic circumstances. However, in addition to a degree, my college years also bestowed me with valuable lessons that I believe will carry me farther than any formal education could. Once I got accepted into Berkeley, I thought I crossed off a big item from my life agenda; but, come freshman year I realized that there were holes in my fairly linear plan. I hadn’t thoroughly considered how my time at Berkeley would impact my identity beyond the classroom. Being a student was so engrained within me, and I soon found that there were points in my college career where my bigger objectives were to manage my relationships and maintain my health. Now - as I sit here writing this from the vantage point of straying from what I felt was a secure, original blueprint - I recognize that this period ahead is asking me to apply my larger ambitions and lessons to manifest abundance in all aspects of my life. Juggling the multitude of emotions and experiences over these last few years has essentially been like training my brain to stay balanced on a surfboard in an effort to ride out the waves of life with as much strength and confidence as possible.

Balance cannot be achieved without training one’s focus. And, while the chaotic global climate has not been overwhelmingly positive, I will say that it has given me the gift of perspective. Last week, I took a solemn walk on campus as a goodbye gesture to the place I have considered home for the last four years. I noticed so many more details than my buzzy, rushed walks to classes ever allowed me to observe. My separation due to quarantine granted me with the ability to relish in the minutiae that I would not otherwise have missed until it was too late to soak them in one last time. A moment of epiphany occurred when I recognized that expecting this change was a blessing, and without the natural ebbs and flows of life I wouldn’t be able to enter this phase with the same brilliant force and appreciation behind me. I feel like my life up until this point has been the gradual baking and stacking of a cake; and, with my tiered foundation now in place, I am ready to continue the process towards my ultimate masterpiece, decorating myself and adding color along the way.

I suppose that in sum, we can never truly predict the dose of change that life will heap onto us; however, what we can do is choose the way we respond. In any situation it is important to stay open-minded to the lessons we may learn about ourselves, as well as foster gratitude. When we take the time to dive within and assess what we can and cannot control, we exercise our capability to remain stable during rocky times. Change has transformed our pasts into our present selves, and change is what is currently building us into better versions to embrace the future. Being thankful for growth relieves the blocks we subconsciously place on ourselves. It is by no means easy, but when we reach a point of self-trust we lose the tension and apprehension that comes with facing changes.

These are scary times for many, and as we continue to face the natural ripples that affect us, we are also all weathering out this global tsunami. I encourage you all to notice your own strength and capabilities – your entire life up until this point has been one extensive course on how to stay afloat, and if you continue to hone in on maintaining your equilibrium, you will not have to fear even the biggest of breakers. While life can seem stagnate at times, other stages offer more action and require more adaptation. Let us not fail to remember that we have all survived changes before, and we have the power to conquer what may lie ahead. xoxo

“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”

— Rumi

Pushing Past Budding Potential to Get to Full Bloom

April 14, 2019 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Lately I have been reflecting a lot on how far I have come in my personal life, noting the key practices and elements that helped me get to this point, along with the areas of my life that I still feel like I have not completely unlocked. Inspired by Michael A. Singer’s book The Untethered Soul, I began to come to the realization that I am my own barrier in knocking down any walls that I currently have or ever will have. One of the most important aspects of my journey to where I am now in life, was that I always tried to follow the idea that you “grow through what you go through,” so whether it was one of my lowest lows or highest highs, there was a lesson that I tried to extract for future application. Secondly, in my past, the most prosperous moments came when I had decided to completely surrender myself to whatever life had in store, erasing any imaginative borders that could confine me to a specific outcome. As I have begun to once again ask myself how I can transcend and open myself to even more abundance, ready to focus on my inner self in a way that I haven’t been recently, I have pieced together that in an effort to grow, I must enter out of my “comfort zone” (a place that only exists because I arbitrarily decided that some things in life are scarier than others).

I have been visualizing myself as a little sprout, hoping to push through the dirt and see the sun, imagining that once I get above ground I will finally be able to absorb all the light and beauty of the world. That is when I realized that my perspective was that I had to struggle to emerge from underneath this soil that was blocking me, rather than noticing that this dirt was chock full of nutrients, helping me in my endeavor. This relief of recognizing that something wasn’t a threat to my existence, but was rather a helpful element that wasn’t worth fighting against brought so much contentment – so much stress was shed and I realized that regardless of my stage in life, I can always just be and welcome in all that the universe is willing to provide. Life shouldn’t be a continuous process to get to a certain point where you think happiness exists, there is always happiness and life waiting to be soaked up every day. We have to teach ourselves to turn this perspective into the dominant lens through which we view life.

However, living life free of stress, fear, etc. is easier said than done, and it definitely is not an overnight process. For me, it helps to set little challenges for myself that help me to physically experience and feel accomplished in overcoming things I presume I cannot. Examples of this can be running the extra two minutes even when you feel like you are going to collapse on the treadmill, smiling and saying hello to someone you don’t know very well even if you think you are risking ultimate embarrassment, or maybe it is just deciding to go to a different coffee shop or take a new walking route to test entering into the unfamiliar at a small scale. After successfully achieving the little goals you set for yourself, it is easy to gain a sense of empowerment that will help you to chip away at your larger personal inner walls, letting that warmth of light peek in, and eventually helping you to enter into an infinite space of possibility.

I highly recommend reading The Untethered Soul, as it does such an amazing job of underlying how much unreasonable attention we give the voices inside of our heads, along with helping to illuminate how to get to the point where life feels like it is an effortless, beautiful flow. We are all in a continual state of growth, but sometimes we hit those walls that require us to reflect on how we can push ourselves to bloom into beings that can truly make the most of every moment and surrender to the winds of life. Try to work on tuning out all the meaningless chatter that suggests that you can’t – it is time for us to be brave and slowly emerge out of the boxes we have placed ourselves in! Have a great week everyone! xoxo

Approaching 2019 Authentically

December 29, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

With only a couple days left until 2019 begins, we have reached that point of the year where there is much talk about “New Year’s Resolutions.” While I think that a fresh year does provide a wonderful slate for us to evaluate and set goals, the idea of a resolutionconjures up the connotation of something we have been unhappy about and want to leave behind, as opposed to the idea of an intention, where we aim towards something, freeing ourselves from the notion of something negative while we set our sights on something positive. My personal intention of 2018 was to not let anyone dim my light, realizing that one person’s shine does not take away from someone else’s. For my upcoming intention, I have chosen to focus on trusting and living my truth, recognizing that everything will fall into place if I surrender and live life as authentically as possible.

One of the foundations on which I built this blog was the idea that if we all strived towards our own positive lives, we could radiate that onto others and thus have a domino effect, resulting in an overall happier and more cohesive society. However, while we hope to be positive influences to those around us, it can be hard to separate from the power of others who might stray us from our individual progress. We live in a world where it is so easy to interact with and be inspired by others, but that also means that we expose ourselves to more information, news, and social media platforms that can set us back in our pursuit of pure bliss. Some people are stronger than others when it comes to ignoring how they are perceived by others or making decisions completely on their own, and while there is nothing wrong with surrounding yourself with supportive and guiding souls, it is important to never lose sight of the messages in your own heart and mind.

Tying together my 2018 and 2019 intentions, I hope to provide the message that we can all be successful and happy, and that a big part in reaching this for ourselves, is to wish success and happiness for others. Therefore, do not get dismayed by those who attempt to dim your light or upheave you from the path you are forging. Advice from outsiders can be quite beneficial, but if it does not resonate with you, move on. Like I have said before, there are multiple routes to the same outcome, that’s why the element of trust and knowing that you are currently the most aligned with your heart and soul are important factors. Trust not only means surrendering yourself to what the universe has planned for you, but it also means believing in yourself, so that when unwanted and unwarranted energies or comments enter your life, you are strong enough to keep shining your most pure light. After all, no one experiences life through your eyes and heart except for you. You are your own most genuine guide.

Reflect on this past year and think of all the things you have learned and gained, and set your own intentions for 2019 so that you can continue to live a life that you are content with. As I write this, I realize that many of my posts are “intention-like,” often focusing on aspects of life that I think are important and that have either helped me or I am presently working on as well. So with everything that I have learned this year, I hope that you too have learned something, either from my posts or in general, and that you keep on growing and evolving, because truly that is what life is all about. The journey doesn’t ever really end. You climb up the steep trails to one scenic lookout, and then you drive right back down searching for the next oasis on the horizon. Wishing everyone a very happy end to 2018 and a wonderful new year ahead! May we all be fearless, patient, grateful, open-minded, authentic, and trusting; here’s to loving one another and embracing new experiences! xoxo

Finding Belonging Without Overbearing

July 18, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration, Travel

Growing up, my family’s go-to vacation spot was Hawaii, and since my very first trip when I was just over a year old, I have always felt a sense of deep belonging to the island state. My name even has Hawaiian roots, meaning “awakening.” No matter how many times I have been fortunate to visit, Maui in particular, seems to ceaselessly call to me. There have been times that I have honestly cried because I longed to smell the fresh, fragrant air and feel the warm ocean mist again. As I prepared for this past trip to Maui, I eagerly anticipated the sensation of peace, oneness, and clarity that I usually experienced while there. Much to my dismay, when I finally arrived I felt frustrated and lost; it felt as though something I loved so much was rejecting me in a sense. The days seemed a little gloomier and rainier than I remembered, and the energy a little less uplifting.

I began to get upset with myself for feeling as though I was not harnessing as much of the vacation as I could have. As my remaining days on the island began to dwindle, the anxiety and unsettledness intensified, making it even harder for me to reach the level of zen I had been hoping to reach in the first place. One morning I decided to go on a run along the beach, followed by a cool down under a palm tree facing the ocean. I closed my eyes and tried to understand why I had felt so separate from “my” sacred space. That’s when I realized that up until that moment, I had felt some sort of elite ownership of the island, a feeling that no one can truly earn because this earth is a shared space amongst all human beings and living things. I had arrived with an expectation that the beautiful land I was entering was going to just give me everything I needed, when in actuality, it had the potential of fulfilling everything if only I had respected the space and put in a little effort to seek out what I desired.

In that moment, I had a revelation that anywhere we are, no matter how familiar or foreign, we belong. We belong because we exist and the universe has placed us in that space at that moment. However, if we feel as though we are the only ones entitled to a given space, we actually bring about a strong sense of loneliness and bitterness onto ourselves. When we shift our perspectives to realize that places and instants are shared, we can then begin to decipher and appreciate our own individual experiences, basking in how wonderful it is that so many different people can benefit from a singular place, person, or idea in various ways. Life truly is what you make of it, and I had been blind to all the beauty that was still surrounding me, even if I did feel like it was a bit alien to me.

Moral of the story: when we enter spaces, regardless if they are old or new, we must be open-minded and acknowledge that we are not alone in whatever we are about to experience. We all have an individual right to feel and react in our own ways, and therefore we need to respect that this world also provides others with their own rights. Like I have said before, the universe is plentiful in its resources for us, but we must be willing to put in a little elbow grease to reap these means so as to reach what we are journeying for. Spread you’re light and love, and light and love will flow back to you!!

How Perspective Plays a Role in Dealing With Personalities

April 29, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

One of the beauties of life is that there is so much variety to it. Life breathes through the green shards of grass beneath our feet to the tiny microorganisms we often ignore, and of course, takes the form of humanity. At the level of humanity, life reaches a whole new scope of complexity. We are exposed to and interact with people who hold different opinions, react to situations in diverse ways, and overall behave in manners unlike our own. Sometimes our encounters with people who are wildly dissimilar to us, or even with people who we are close to who don’t always meet our expectations, leave us feeling unsure of ourselves and can cause frustration or confusion at a personal level. In an effort to make interactions with others as positive as possible and to mitigate any potential negatives, it is important that we keep our perspectives in check.

When taking on the world and all that is in it, I think it is easy to see things only through our own personal lens, using our uniquely individual sights and feelings to define what is “normal.” However, the fact of the matter is that we as individuals do not represent the entirety of this universe, we have it running through us, but we are all a special combination of its characteristics. This means that when we enter into a situation involving others, we need to step back and process the idea that not everyone is a perfect replica of ourselves and that we need to keep an open mind to others’ potentially different approaches. By avoiding turning to our default setting of using ourselves as a standard, we also dodge the disappointment that would come with the other person not meeting our expectations. Essentially, the goal is to expect people to be different and then be pleasantly surprised if we resonate with them more than we previously thought we would, or can at least view the situation as broadening our own perspective through trying on someone else’s lens.

We have to learn to accept people for who they are and recognize their own individual patterns in an effort to better understand the healthiest way to interact with them. If we know someone tends to air on a side much different than our own, we are at least then in the headspace of “okay so-and-so often times feels/reacts like this…,” and we can adjust our own advances in a way that is conscious of the other person’s habits. Often times in my own life, I have to remind myself of other people’s tendencies so as to better handle the situation and not get disappointed when the other person feels or acts in a way I wouldn’t. Trying to understand why someone has the viewpoint that they do also supports smooth encounters; for example, sometimes we need to be more sensitive to the other person’s background or current life circumstances.

All in all, with everything in life, I think it is important to take away the positives from every situation, so we generally should approach interactions with others as an experience to learn more about ourselves, as well as expose ourselves to the glorious array that surrounds us. Sometimes this diversity can lead to a sense of loneliness or confusion when we have repeated interactions with people that we don’t seem to completely click with, which is why we have to acknowledge everyone’s individual place and perspectives in this world. Don’t be afraid to be yourself and let your light shine as to attract others of your same vibrations, all while respecting other people’s different colored lights in the process of making new connections!

The Importance of Being an Explorer

March 02, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Growing up, my mom always imparted on me the wisdom of my great-grandmother: “Be a trier.” These three words have influenced my life heavily, as I guide my life with the perspective that some things I need to experience before I have the authority to gauge my stance. Whether it’s a new food, a new idea, or a new activity (especially one that pushes me out of my comfort zone), I keep in the back of my mind that I must give it a shot if I want to expand my knowledge, knowing that the worst that can happen is that I learn that whatever I tried isn’t something I want to partake in again in the future. This morning as I began brainstorming how to formulate my thoughts into an intelligible blog post, I made myself some tea (and I like the kind that has a little quote to ponder as you sip) and the quote of today’s tea bag was: “Experience will give you the power and confidence to be you.” And that’s when all my thoughts came together.

I absolutely love traveling, but for me the term “explorer” goes beyond the physical act of going on some exotic journey, to also include just the act of “exploring” other options, different perspectives, a bite of that interesting looking dish at the neighborhood potluck… you get the idea! From an early age I’d like to say that I have had an inherent curiosity and thirst for knowledge pushing me to seek out a plethora of new experiences, but I know that some people are more homebodies. Which brings me to my overall message that I hope to instill: even if you wouldn’t describe yourself as one who wishes to go outside of your normal routine, the act of exploring in any sense of the word is so enriching and benefitting. With this freshness that comes with the start of March, I encourage everyone to make this month one of healthy challenge, setting at least one new goal to attempt that pushes the boundaries of the “normalness’ of the everyday.

When we spread our wings and immerse ourselves in something new, we add one more notch to the repertoire of things that make us who we are, since after all, we are all unique creations that have been shaped and molded by our individual life experiences. The more books we’ve read, people we’ve met, places we’ve gone, foods that we’ve tried, etc., the greater awareness we have for the world around us, and thus the more accurately we can place ourselves in the greater context of this diverse world. In my own life, certain experiences have illuminated feelings that were deep inside me all along, but that I could only place a finger on once I was exposed to the converse feeling through an exploration or heard someone else put words to my ambiguous emotions.

I think that when we as human beings take an active approach towards life, meaning that we maintain an open-minded perspective and allow ourselves to continually absorb new knowledge, we work to cultivate a society that is more culturally aware and empathetic. By encouraging our own selves to take advantage of all the wonderful possibilities in life, we are opening ourselves up to being pleasantly surprised and learning something about our own beings, or we can at least take pride in entering and surviving something that wasn’t necessarily our “cup of tea,” but that we now have an educated background in and thus can have justified attitudes towards. In working on making our inverse one of more unity, we need to all have a small taste of what other people’s “normal” is, so we should all view ourselves as “world detectives,” doing our best to collect all that we can so that we can make supported claims, have a better understanding of who we are, and add to the evidence that there is something that connects us all as human beings.

So go out and try a new cuisine, read a new genre of books, watch a documentary on an unfamiliar topic… or maybe even book a flight to that place you’ve always wanted to go to! We never cease to be students of life, so let’s all make the most of our priceless education!