How Perspective Plays a Role in Dealing With Personalities

April 29, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

One of the beauties of life is that there is so much variety to it. Life breathes through the green shards of grass beneath our feet to the tiny microorganisms we often ignore, and of course, takes the form of humanity. At the level of humanity, life reaches a whole new scope of complexity. We are exposed to and interact with people who hold different opinions, react to situations in diverse ways, and overall behave in manners unlike our own. Sometimes our encounters with people who are wildly dissimilar to us, or even with people who we are close to who don’t always meet our expectations, leave us feeling unsure of ourselves and can cause frustration or confusion at a personal level. In an effort to make interactions with others as positive as possible and to mitigate any potential negatives, it is important that we keep our perspectives in check.

When taking on the world and all that is in it, I think it is easy to see things only through our own personal lens, using our uniquely individual sights and feelings to define what is “normal.” However, the fact of the matter is that we as individuals do not represent the entirety of this universe, we have it running through us, but we are all a special combination of its characteristics. This means that when we enter into a situation involving others, we need to step back and process the idea that not everyone is a perfect replica of ourselves and that we need to keep an open mind to others’ potentially different approaches. By avoiding turning to our default setting of using ourselves as a standard, we also dodge the disappointment that would come with the other person not meeting our expectations. Essentially, the goal is to expect people to be different and then be pleasantly surprised if we resonate with them more than we previously thought we would, or can at least view the situation as broadening our own perspective through trying on someone else’s lens.

We have to learn to accept people for who they are and recognize their own individual patterns in an effort to better understand the healthiest way to interact with them. If we know someone tends to air on a side much different than our own, we are at least then in the headspace of “okay so-and-so often times feels/reacts like this…,” and we can adjust our own advances in a way that is conscious of the other person’s habits. Often times in my own life, I have to remind myself of other people’s tendencies so as to better handle the situation and not get disappointed when the other person feels or acts in a way I wouldn’t. Trying to understand why someone has the viewpoint that they do also supports smooth encounters; for example, sometimes we need to be more sensitive to the other person’s background or current life circumstances.

All in all, with everything in life, I think it is important to take away the positives from every situation, so we generally should approach interactions with others as an experience to learn more about ourselves, as well as expose ourselves to the glorious array that surrounds us. Sometimes this diversity can lead to a sense of loneliness or confusion when we have repeated interactions with people that we don’t seem to completely click with, which is why we have to acknowledge everyone’s individual place and perspectives in this world. Don’t be afraid to be yourself and let your light shine as to attract others of your same vibrations, all while respecting other people’s different colored lights in the process of making new connections!

Snowy Search For Strength

April 06, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Travel, Inspiration

This post is inspired by my latest travels to the charming city of Québec, Canada. Rather that start in chronological order, I'd like to skip to the very last moments of my vacation where we only had 10 minutes to make our second flight's gate after our first connecting flight was delayed. There we were, running through the Montreal airport, clad in our big snow boots and snow coats, heavy backpacks and suitcases in tow. I'll spare you all the details of our terrible experience in Customs and jump to the point where I race up to the gate and collapse over the desk while desperately offering up my passport and ticket to the agent, only to have her say, "Madame don't worry, we haven't starting boarding yet." And that's when I realized: why did I ever doubt that the universe wouldn't have stalled the plane for us so that we could be exactly where we needed to be?

The entire trip got me thinking about how grateful I am that I have the opportunity to see the world and follow my dreams, which then got me mulling over the age-old debate of luck vs. hard work. Throughout our explorations everything found a way of working out and it felt like things seamlessly fell into place or were justified through later little karmic experiences. As I reflected on everything, I came to the personal conclusion that life is a balance of both "luck" and hard work. (I put luck in quotations because I truly believe that life is simply a blueprint of what the universe has planned for you, so everything is exactly as it's meant to be… hence we don't get lucky, we are fortunate!) Essentially, we all have the power of the universe working behind us, but it is also up to us to acknowledge the full potential of this power, surrender to it, and do our part in the physical world to achieve the full effect of our goals.

In other words, we are fortunate that the universe provides us with the opportunities that it does and ensures that what is meant to be will be (like making sure your plane is just as late as you are!). But the second that we realize that we have the power to change our perspective and statements from "I wish/hope/want" to "I will/am," we activate our "hard work" portion by harnessing the power of our self will to align with the magic of the universe that acts as the tail wind pushing us towards these goals that we have now affirmed we will dedicate ourselves to. I personally used to say, "I want to be a blogger," "I want to travel," etc. and for a while I was stuck in a rut feeling like I wasn't living my life like the person I wanted to be. Finally one day it hit me: there was no reason other than the fact that I was treating these things as hypothetical "wouldn't it be nice" statements instead of saying "I am…”. The entire time I had been sitting there aimlessly wishing was time that I wasn’t going out and realizing that I had all the tools in front of me (thank you universe!) to fully actualize my aspirations. I needed to make the decision to live purposefully because it was just a matter of me not running through all the wonderful doors that had been there, opened in front of me the entire time. And the funny thing is, is the more doors you say, "I am going to run through you" to, the more doors that seem to fly open on the other side.

The moral to this story is that even when life feels like you are buried under heavy clothes and baggage, do your part to run and the universe will make sure that the door (or in my case, airplane gate :) ) will be open for you in the end! I know I talk a lot about our individual power, but it's so true that we all have the power within us to manifest our dreams and desires. Be patient and know you aren't alone, trust in yourself and the universe around you!

Renewing With the Spring Season

March 16, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

On Tuesday the 20th, we enter into the Spring Equinox, a time meant to revitalize and renew our spirits. In preparation for this welcoming of spring, we can look inwards and almost do a "spring-cleaning" for the soul. What's going well in life right now? What has been nagging at us that we can take action on? What's in balance and what isn't?

This is a great time for us to consider whether or not we are doing our best at fulfilling our souls, recognizing that it is healthy to take a step back and give our minds and bodies the time they need to recover before once again subjecting ourselves into a new physically or emotionally demanding situation (as lots of life's moments can be!). Revitalize by doing little things like taking advantage of these longer, slightly warmer days and letting yourself soak up the sun! Remember that if we don't start by first taking the time to respect and nurture ourselves, it becomes hard to be able to benefit and engage with society and those around us.

Someone very close to me just got me a sign that says, "Grow through what you go through," which I think is super appropriate given that with the change of the seasons we will see more of nature bloom, and we too can amplify our souls' radiance from within! Spring is symbolic of light, also making the concept of "you have to have darkness to see the light" relatable. I encourage everyone to celebrate this emergence of new life within nature, to get together with those who matter most, and to simply celebrate life.

I think a key term that encompasses the essence of this time is: balance. Life is a continuum of experiences and emotions, but the important thing is to allow ourselves the space to go through the varying times that come our way. I want to emphasize that there shouldn't be any guilt with pursuing things that enrich your life, whether it be going out to grab a bite at the place you've been craving lately or staying in instead of going out when you feel like you need a personal reboot. This seasonal transition serves as a checkpoint for us to take what we have learned thus far and try to utilize it to its greatest ability to positively impact the future.

Have a beautiful weekend and may this spring season give you the opportunity to revitalize and transform into even lighter and more balanced version of yourself!

The Importance of Being an Explorer

March 02, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Growing up, my mom always imparted on me the wisdom of my great-grandmother: “Be a trier.” These three words have influenced my life heavily, as I guide my life with the perspective that some things I need to experience before I have the authority to gauge my stance. Whether it’s a new food, a new idea, or a new activity (especially one that pushes me out of my comfort zone), I keep in the back of my mind that I must give it a shot if I want to expand my knowledge, knowing that the worst that can happen is that I learn that whatever I tried isn’t something I want to partake in again in the future. This morning as I began brainstorming how to formulate my thoughts into an intelligible blog post, I made myself some tea (and I like the kind that has a little quote to ponder as you sip) and the quote of today’s tea bag was: “Experience will give you the power and confidence to be you.” And that’s when all my thoughts came together.

I absolutely love traveling, but for me the term “explorer” goes beyond the physical act of going on some exotic journey, to also include just the act of “exploring” other options, different perspectives, a bite of that interesting looking dish at the neighborhood potluck… you get the idea! From an early age I’d like to say that I have had an inherent curiosity and thirst for knowledge pushing me to seek out a plethora of new experiences, but I know that some people are more homebodies. Which brings me to my overall message that I hope to instill: even if you wouldn’t describe yourself as one who wishes to go outside of your normal routine, the act of exploring in any sense of the word is so enriching and benefitting. With this freshness that comes with the start of March, I encourage everyone to make this month one of healthy challenge, setting at least one new goal to attempt that pushes the boundaries of the “normalness’ of the everyday.

When we spread our wings and immerse ourselves in something new, we add one more notch to the repertoire of things that make us who we are, since after all, we are all unique creations that have been shaped and molded by our individual life experiences. The more books we’ve read, people we’ve met, places we’ve gone, foods that we’ve tried, etc., the greater awareness we have for the world around us, and thus the more accurately we can place ourselves in the greater context of this diverse world. In my own life, certain experiences have illuminated feelings that were deep inside me all along, but that I could only place a finger on once I was exposed to the converse feeling through an exploration or heard someone else put words to my ambiguous emotions.

I think that when we as human beings take an active approach towards life, meaning that we maintain an open-minded perspective and allow ourselves to continually absorb new knowledge, we work to cultivate a society that is more culturally aware and empathetic. By encouraging our own selves to take advantage of all the wonderful possibilities in life, we are opening ourselves up to being pleasantly surprised and learning something about our own beings, or we can at least take pride in entering and surviving something that wasn’t necessarily our “cup of tea,” but that we now have an educated background in and thus can have justified attitudes towards. In working on making our inverse one of more unity, we need to all have a small taste of what other people’s “normal” is, so we should all view ourselves as “world detectives,” doing our best to collect all that we can so that we can make supported claims, have a better understanding of who we are, and add to the evidence that there is something that connects us all as human beings.

So go out and try a new cuisine, read a new genre of books, watch a documentary on an unfamiliar topic… or maybe even book a flight to that place you’ve always wanted to go to! We never cease to be students of life, so let’s all make the most of our priceless education!

Mindful Manifestation

February 16, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Happy Friday + start of a long weekend for some of us! I know I have discussed the art of attracting what you put your mind to and how as individuals we have the power within us to physically cultivate what we visualize, but I wanted to really hone in on this again this week, hopefully adding another layer to this topic. For about the past month, I have diligently been journaling every night before bed, in addition to starting and ending my days with reflection on what I am grateful for and what went well and what I intend to improve on in coming days. I cannot emphasize enough how much this practice truly alters your perspective in the most positive ways possible and truly rewires the fibers of your being to be more in tune on picking up more of the good in life than the bad.

Since getting back in touch with myself and experiencing my intense feelings of gratitude, I realized that it makes environments that were previously neutral to become, at times, more susceptible to being uncomfortable. This is why I feel that it is important to look at manifestation from the angle of helping others to also see the positives as well, and in a sense mindfully play your role in a larger focus on all the amazing things there are in this world to be grateful for. We might not always have control over the external influencers that surround us, but we do have the power to either nurture the negativity or plant positivity. When I started this blog, my intent was to get everyone to see what they could do individually in an effort to collectively add up to a more visible change within society, so I think this is an important reminder that even by choosing to not endorse negativity on even the smallest of scales, is an act of utilizing your individual power for a greater good.

In an effort to minimize the unwanted effects of negativity onto my psyche, I like to picture a large aura of golden light acting as a shield for negativity to bounce off of and keep myself rooted in positivity. Another practice that I find super helpful is to purposefully exhale what I visualize as black smoke that may be trying to taint my inner peace. By taking the time to recenter and release what has the potential to agitate me, I become consciously reminded that it is outside factors working against me, and thus I am able to move on with my day in a manner that is solely guided by my inner positivity.

The important thing to understand is that the outside world won't always be conducive to our positivity, but that there are ways to mitigate the outside world’s effects. Taking the time to consciously recognize that we don’t need to be confined to the emotional molds that can sometimes be pressured onto us allows us to lead our lives as close to our internal scripts as possible. Keep in mind that it isn’t selfish to take time during the day to do something for yourself, like dedicate 10-15 minutes to one of your favorite activities, or just to do some deep breathing.

Have an amazing weekend everyone + remember that you have the power to protect your positivity!

What I’ve Learned About Love (+ Things Related to It)

February 02, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Happy February! In honor of it being the month of love, I thought it would be appropriate to discuss a few of the insights I’ve gained in the relatively short twenty years that I have been a part of this world. I feel like naturally February is associated with the romantic love that comes with being in a relationship, but there are so many other forms of love that deserve recognition too! Today’s culture has cultivated this trend of looking forward to Valentine’s Day if you are in a steady partnership, while the rest of the world holds feelings of bitterness and makes self-deprecating jokes about loneliness, but I am here to encourage us all to embrace love generally no matter the time of year.

1. Loved Ones Deserve Love – Since coming to college, I have realized that loved ones, like family members, often serve as our emotional bounce board since we take their love for granted. They are often the ones we feel so safe with, that we dump all of our negativity, rants, stress, etc. on them. Usually, it isn’t under after we’ve cooled down and recovered from whatever situation we were dealing with, that we realize the majority of our time talking to our beloved was spent hashing out everything but what should have been the focus of the conversation. Moral of the story here: although it is healthy to express your emotions in a safe space, remember to reach out to loved ones during times when its not just because you need a shoulder to lean and cry on. Express your appreciation and love for those that are close to you, and challenge yourself to reach out to people just to see how their days are or discuss something that is making life great at the moment!

2. Love Can Heal The Wounds It Causes – Referring back to the various levels of love, sometimes we find ourselves in a position where the love we had for someone is forced to retreat into the cavities of our hearts as we are no longer able to love that person in the capacity that we previously did. These instances can often make their mark by leaving a substantial scar on our hearts, which then arouses many questions, feelings of doubt and paranoia, and potentially, deep pain and sadness. However, unlike salt, if we add love from other areas of life to the wound that love itself created, we find that new happiness and growth appears in our lives. Self-love, love from family and friends, and healing love energies from nature can all help to not only mend a gash of love, but to also thrive and blossom into more loving, powerful, and tuned-in individuals. Moral of the story here: love isn’t easy, it can inflict just as much pain as it can intense comfort, but the important thing to keep in mind is that love is everywhere. There is not ever just one sole source of love, so there should never be a lack of healing love to act as a cure for times when you are searching for the antidote to heartache.

3. Love is Ever-Present – Like I said above, love is everywhere and in everything. Sometimes though, our love levels vary, not just for different things, but for one thing in particular. I think this most strongly applies to self-love, where one minute we are feeling good and empowered, and the next we are beating ourselves up over something. It is in these times, when we feel defeated and feel a bit lack luster in our outflow of love for something, be it ourselves or a life passion, that we must keep in mind that just because we don’t feel the same strong intensity of love that we have felt before, doesn’t mean that there is no love left. Sometimes outside factors or unnamable forces drain our current love (along with other emotions!) and we find ourselves in a funk. This does not mean that for instance, if you are an English major you should go rethink your entire life the second you just aren’t feeling motivated to write an essay! Instances of low love and deficient motivation only mean that we need to sow and tend to the flame of love that still burns within us, regardless if it is currently very dim. Moral of the story: as humans, our existence is reliant on the presence of love and we always have it coursing through us even in the times when it feels absent. Essentially, we need to remember to take a few steps back and listen to our souls in an effort to get an accurate census of our fluctuating feelings.

I know I am still a student of this Earth and that I still have a multitude of lessons to learn in my lifetime, but I hope that these small pieces on love have either resonated with you, provided you with some insight, or at least inspired you to continue to spread love. This month, I challenge you to elevate your love and reach out to an old friend or someone you appreciate, give a stranger a compliment, dedicate time to enriching yourself, or partaking in some sort of gratitude/love practice that you do not already consistently do in your everyday routines. Remember that the love you pour out into the world will be returned to you! Here’s to a fresh month dedicated to the driving force of our universe!

Enriching Reads: Installment #2

January 27, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Enriching Reading, Inspiration

Robert Frost once said, “Poetry is when an emotion found its thought and the thought has found words.” A couple years ago, I was on a weekend trip in the snowy woods, and I found myself in one of the cutest little bookstores ever. Being an avid writer and reader, I always get excited when I discover new, unique shops that support the written word, especially in its printed form. As I skimmed the titles on the shelves, this yellow book, tucked away on the very bottom shelf, struck me. And that is how I happened upon “The Gift,” which I feel truly lives up to its title, and I hope through me sharing this with you, you feel as though a little piece of magic has been bestowed upon you as well.

I regard Hafiz’s “The Gift” as one of the most influential collections of writing that I have ever read. His words provoke such profound thoughts and feelings, and when I first read his poems, I was overwhelmed with this sense of connection that I had never fully experienced before. It amazed me that someone could write about concepts so far ahead of my time, yet touch me with them in a way that made me feel as if they were directly written for me to absorb. Hafiz’s poems helped me to put in perspective that we are all loved and never lonely, thanks to the powerful universe that we belong to.

Excerpt from The Gift — Excerpt from *The Gift*

In the first verse of his poem “Looking for Good Fish,” Hafiz writes:

Why complain about life

If you are looking for good fish

And have followed some idiot

Into the middle of the copper market?

I interpreted this segment, which is representative of the poem as a whole, to mean that if we focus on the negative or continue to pursue paths that don’t proactively help your case, you really don’t have the authority to complain. His poem resolves in teaching us that we shouldn’t look beyond ourselves for fulfillment, love, and other emotional contentment, since we all have the universe flowing within us and have all been intentionally placed within this world that was created out of love.

Hafiz, who was a Sufi master, has such an amazing way of highlighting the common threads throughout all of humanity and illuminating our oneness with the world. I think another beautiful aspect is that because it is poetry, it can be interpreted in multiple ways, further supporting the idea that we all experience similar feelings, just in different situations. Even if you just want to indulge in a few of Hafiz’s poems, I highly recommend seeking out his words. I hope this post and suggestion brings you some enlightenment! Feel free to comment below your favorite poem, thoughts that you experienced through them, or other reading suggestions!

The Gift - Poems by Hafiz the Great Sufi Master by Hafiz, Daniel Ladinsky [26 August 1999]

Penguin Books Australia

Buy on Amazon

How to Harness the Capricorn New Moon

January 19, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

January has been full of incredible coincidences (or universal winks as I like to call them) and intense energy so far. Something super exciting is that the new Moon just a few days ago was in Capricorn, (which as a Capricorn, makes this time even more exhilarating for me) but in general we can all benefit from this universal energy that is currently present. This is the first time since 1991 that we have had a Capricorn new moon, so this is definitely an opportunity we should not pass up. Over the course of the next six months, we can connect to the power of Capricorn to forgive, conserve, honor, manifest, reflect, and adventure.

Capricorn is an earth sign, which makes these next few months a really important time to focus on the planet, whether it be in the sense of implementing a new environmentally-friendly practice or making an effort to get in tune with nature around us. A few ideas that you might want to consider are: going on a hike, meditating in a grassy spot (grass is a great absorbent of negative energy!), cutting back on the amount of animal products you are consuming, or investing in reusable wares to limit your individual waste production. Also, because crystals are of the earth, this is an especially great time to turn to crystals for healing energy and manifestation rituals.

Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park, CA // June 2015

This planetary shift into Capricorn also encourages forgiveness. I think I have touched upon forgiving in the past, in addition to the idea of acceptance and surrendering, but I wanted to bring up the idea of forgiveness in yet another context: forgiving tied to learning. Although I can guarantee we all have heard that we “learn from our mistakes,” it is actually true. Often times, it isn’t until we can look at something in retrospect that we can extract a lesson from it, even if our experience has possibly already subconsciously altered our thoughts and actions. To help get through stressful times, it is important to recognize that though life can be full of lots of little messes, in the future they can clear up to be something great. Narrowing in on a life goal and taking the time to visualize it, can really help to attract it and turn it into a reality.

So, no matter what your zodiac sign is, lets all relish this new power and utilize it to the fullest. Try something new, get outside, and act with purpose and intent. Remember that although the sun leaves Capricorn after today, we still have time to harness this energy. I will end this post with a quote that stands by my bedside at home: “Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we’re here we should dance.” Wishing everyone a rejuvenating and revitalizing weekend!!

Being a Warrior Within

January 12, 2018 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Moving into this fairly new year, there seems to be a worldly trend of reaching out and speaking up. The momentum is building up for a major breakthrough in standing up for our values and correcting injustices on various scales. Today’s media is loaded with news in regards to people coming out and speaking up in an effort to make the world a more honest environment. And while we might not all be making the headlines, I think it is important to recognize that we all have the strength to rise up and confront situations and issues that our souls do not approve of.

As we journey through life, we continue to grow and uncover more of life’s truths each and every day. Therefore, we must allow our values to evolve with us, recognizing that what we stand for can change (and hopefully this is for the better as we begin to appreciate what truly matters in life). I know from personal experience that as I have transitioned into adulthood, it has been harder for me to un-see or not acknowledge some ugly realities within our society. Small comments, jokes, and even the lack of compassionate actions no longer go over my head, and I often feel the urge to do my part and call people out in an effort to end the perpetual cycle of injustice that seems to be ingrained in our society. This isn’t always easy though, as the people near and dear to us are not immune from having different viewpoints that we might not be able to wholeheartedly support. Sometimes, instead of confrontation, we have to leave the situation at knowing in our own hearts we wouldn’t say the same thing or act in the same way (I am still trying to teach and remind myself of this, as I tend to make my feelings known…we are all human!).

Along these lines of being a warrior within, we must traverse the obstacles of life with our health and happiness in perspective. Although at times it might feel like we are helpless or weaker than someone else, we all have strength within us that increases with every action we take to better ourselves. For instance, in my own life, I was dealing with a situation in which I was scared of being alone and was compromising my own happiness out of fear. I make the analogy that there is one of those ancient balance scales in my head where eventually my strength slightly edged above my current situation, and I finally stood up for what I believed to be fairer. Showing myself that I was strong and could speak up (and survive it!), invigorated and empowered me, allowing my vigor to carry into other areas of my life. I suppose the essence of what I am trying to convey, is that we all deserve a life that offers us maximum happiness, a life where we do not even have to consider if “the grass is greener on the other side” so to speak. That’s why we must guide our lives from a place of assertion, firmly rooted in our beliefs and playing our role in making the world as just as possible.

St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands // April 2015

Make 2018 the year of you and the change you want to see in the world around you. At times we might have to tread lightly, but if our soul seems discontent with something, we should not ignore that feeling. We must act from our hearts and know that we all have a warrior within. We all have a strong pillar of light that runs through us, not only connecting us to the universe and shielding us from negativity, but that can also guide us through our life decisions and clarify our next steps.

Have a stellar weekend everyone! Listen to your heart and soul, and let them direct you in ways that illuminate the truth!

Reflecting + Letting Go

December 27, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

As we approach the end of the year we are given the opportunity to set behind us anything that no longer serves us and move forward with specific intentions. Setting New Year’s resolutions is a great practice, but it should not go without also reflecting on the past holistically, and surrendering anything that does not fill us with pure happiness and positivity. It is important that we take this new year as a fresh start and shed any emotional weight that the past year brought.

The first step to making the most of this clean slate that 2018 presents, is to recognize anything that does not fulfill us or elevate us to a higher self. We must acknowledge whatever obstacles or rough times we dealt with this past year and allow them to be, letting go of the baggage and moving forward in a more positive direction. We cannot always control the events that have happened, but we do have control over how much energy we expend on dwelling on what cannot be altered or put towards cultivating something that advances us towards more bliss. A great way to help surrender feelings and other things we wish to release, is to physically write each thing on its own individual piece of paper, and then either place the pieces of paper wrapped in foil within the freezer, burn them, or simply tuck them away during a full moon. This clears them from your mind and psyche, giving them the proper space to be, while also stripping them of the power to influence your energy field in a negative manner.

It is also crucial that we forgive ourselves for anything we feel is withholding us from our greater potential, along with keeping in mind that everything happens for a reason. As we reflect, we must remind ourselves that although we may not have made some of the same decisions or taken the same actions that we did, at the time they might have been the most appropriate decisions and actions, and therefore we cannot blame ourselves. Life is a continual process of learning and broadening our scope of the world, facing various twists and turns, but with each new bump or sticky situation, having a larger “tool belt” to approach things with.

There is so much in this life to be grateful for, and when we utilize our individual power to bring upon more positivity, then we are doing the best that we can. Being that we are all human, I am sure that at some point in the past twelve months we were all tested or found ourselves in a period that lacked optimal happiness. But with that comes the fact that we are all now at this current point in life, having grown stronger and wiser in this past year, and can now apply our experiences to the future. Allow things to be, accept them for what they are, acknowledge their effect on you, and then approach future moments with a fresh outlook. May this upcoming year be filled with more love, laughter, and joyous moments!

Emphasizing Expression

December 20, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

One of my favorite quotes comes from Maya Angelou who once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” During this time of the year that has a large focus on gift-giving, I wanted to recognize the fact that it is important to “give” in a sense all year long, and that one of the best ways to do so is through expression. This means actively expressing your feelings for those around you, reminding people that they are loved for and appreciated.

Golden Gate Bridge, San Fransisco, CA // April 2017

I think that a lot goes unsaid in our daily lives. For instance, we might really like someone’s style or really enjoy talking to someone, but we don’t always vocalize these feelings, leaving them as unappreciated thoughts. However, if we were able to acknowledge our thoughts and let people know how loved and respected they were, not only would they benefit in multiple ways, but we would benefit by opening up our own doors to positive energy. It is a natural tendency for people to be concerned with how they are being perceived by others, and I am sure we have all wondered at one point what someone else thought of us. In an effort to move towards a more accepting and loving universe, it is important that we begin to manifest our feelings into words and openly express them. This leads to people feeling more content as they receive the acknowledgement that plays an important role in our souls’ wellness.

It is unfortunate that most of the time, the things that we think to say are usually when we are in opposition to something, or strongly dislike a certain aspect, leaving the things we feel as positives as mere individual contentment without putting it out in the world. While you can still voice your opinions when you feel like something should be changed, we should try to match our adverse comments with an equal amount of positive comments about things. So the next time you find that you are thinking to yourself how great someone is or how much something meant to you, try to formulate your feelings to words and share them with the person that they apply to. Complimenting people and making your appreciation known is one of the most meaningful (and easiest!) practices we can do as individuals, and they often have a larger effect than material gifts. Letting people know how you feel when you have the chance is an opportunity that should never be passed up. Happy Holidays! Make sure to be in the present and let the people around you know how much they are cared for!

Ways to De-Stress and Slow Down

December 08, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Lifestyle, Inspiration

For me this week has been full of studying, (which I am sure anyone else who is a student can relate to, as finals are soon approaching!) and my abilities to manage stress have definitely been under the test! In an effort to help minimize stress and still enjoy this “crunch time,” I’ve compiled a list of my top three favorite ways to take a breather and regain perspective! (They are even great when you aren’t stressed!)

Three years ago, I was fortunate enough to travel to Costa Rica, and one of the biggest things I took away from that trip was the beauty of the Costa Rican people’s mastery of not stressing. Everything there seemed to work at a slower pace – a pace that allowed for a greater appreciation of the life and scenery surrounding them. They seemed to go through their daily lives with what I perceived to almost be an immense trust in superior guidance, which alleviated stress since they were able to accept that most things in life are out of their control. I hope that these following acts can help to ground you at any moment in your life and relieve some of the stress that can often bog us down.

Manuel Antonio National Park, Costa Rica // January 2015

1. Watch the Sunset!! – This is my absolute favorite way to detach myself from the overwhelming feelings of life and be reminded of the unfathomable beauty on this planet. Within the past few months, I had a revelation of how rarely people take the time to appreciate the sunset. Most of us simply just take it for granted, even though every day we have the opportunity to immerse ourselves into a free opportunity to see one of the most awing processes. Its something literally anyone, anywhere (although not at the same time!) can relate to, and every evening the sunset is different, so this practice never gets old!! It’s a great occasion to mull over internal thoughts, ponder life questions, or spend time with someone you love and enjoy the energy of life together!

2. Read Poetry!! – Poems are a great way to reinvigorate your sense of belonging on this Earth. My two favorite poetry books are “The Essential Rumi” and Hafiz’s collection, “The Gift.” Every time I read a work out of either of these two books, I remember that these are the words of people long before my time, yet they still resonate with me. And because of that, I realize I am not alone in my feelings and life explorations. Give yourself a ten-minute mental break to find a quote or poem, and then really absorb what it is saying. You might be surprised to find how refreshing it can be to hear your feelings put into words by someone else, reminding you of your individual importance and also your validity in this universe as a whole.

3. Grab a Hot Drink (with or without friends) – It might sound silly, something as simple as “grabbing a hot drink” as a way to help solve the stressors of life, but it can actually do the trick! Regardless if I am alone or with someone, the act of taking time to sip on something can be a great reminder of slowing down your pace and taking a step back from frantic energy. Whenever I am enjoying a tea or coffee, I push myself to not check my phone and completely soak in the present moment, savoring the flavors of the drink and taking my time to thoroughly enjoy it. I think often times we feel we can’t afford even the smallest of breaks, but I tend to find that the time we consider we would be wasting on things, even though they have the potential to actually benefit us, ends up getting wasted anyways as we aimlessly spend time on our phones. I think it is healthy to schedule blocks of time where you know you are going to dedicate yourself to something meaningful, because after, you feel so much more revitalized and can actually focus better when you return to your work.

These three things are small, but can have a big positive effect! And even if these don’t strike you as things you are interested in, there are plenty of other great de-stressors out there! The important thing is that you compile your own list of things that you can turn to when you need a little relief in your life. Remember to stay positive, and as my mom always reminds me for those things that are extra anxiety inducing, “This too shall pass.”

Mood: Cloudy With a Chance of Happiness

December 01, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Entering into December and with the holidays (aka the season to be merry) right around the corner, I wanted to write about the reality of feeling depressed or apathetic, while still being happy or excited about certain things. In the past, I have had periods of time where I battled with deep ruts of depression, and more recently I have experienced times of apathy. It was the other day, when I was reflecting on how this past year has been full of some of the happiest moments of my life, while also acknowledging that I was going through some pretty strong negative emotions that were bringing me down, that I realized there isn’t a definitive line that restricts someone to solely being depressed or solely being happy. It occurred to me that life is a continuum of both sides of the spectrum of emotions, and that realization helped me shed a layer of anxiety and guilt I didn’t realize I was carrying with me. For the longest time I was subconsciously giving myself anxiety from the self-inflicted confusion that came from feeling thankful for aspects of my life and feeling excited for certain things, while at the same time feeling an intense darkness suffocating me overall.

I think one of the biggest things that come from situations of mixed emotions is guilt and confusion. Here we are, trying to focus on what we are grateful for and trying to stay positive, but then we are also feeling a cloud of gloom overhead. I know for me personally, this can either cause me to feel guilty for not being able to release my melancholy feelings (since I am always so eternally blessed and overjoyed to have the amazing people that I do in life), or it can cause conflict and uncertainty with myself since I cannot sort out why I am feeling opposing emotions. The moral to my story is that at the end of the day, we are all just trying to do the best that we can individually, day by day. This means that as long as we continue to give recognition to the things that we do have in life that make us happy, whether it be friends, family, or even looking forward to a holiday tradition, we are on the right path. And taking these positive steps in the right direction doesn’t make us any less human or any more immune to feelings of upset and depression.

In today’s society, I think we place a lot of pressure on the holiday season and teeter on the edge of focusing more on the negatives, claiming it’s a time when chances of gaining weight are higher and that hosting families and festivities is more stressful than enjoyable. So I think this winter presents itself as a great time to tackle some of the overwhelming adverse feelings we might have, while still allowing ourselves to be happy and look forward to certain seasonal merriments. I think it is also important to insert here, that there is in fact so much to appreciate during the holidays that often gets drowned out when we approach things with the mindset of “once the holidays are over, I’ll be able to relax.” If you find yourself being one of those people who do view the holidays in this way, challenge yourself this season to take the time to really soak in the cheer in the air and enjoy quality time spent with loved ones (something that might be rare if you are in college and living away from home like me!).

Overall though, regardless of what time of the year it is, this world is naturally filled with things that provoke sadness, even just turning on the news or checking a social media account can remind us of the things that we generally want to ignore. It is important though that through times of upset, we still try to see the positive, and hopefully these efforts will lead to an even bigger effect of lessening these sadness provoking things in our world. Hopefully we can move towards a society that has news that is more positive and inspirational.

Happy December 1st everyone!! Let’s embrace this month filled with spirit and gratitude!

Channeling Fearlessness

November 26, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

Hello! For the longest time I have kept this blog privatized, being too insecure to allow my thoughts and feelings to be so exposed to those around me, but I have finally come to the point in life where I want to give my creative project the space and recognition I always envisioned it would have. As I continue to grow as an individual and solidify my purpose on this planet, my one steady goal in mind has been to leave a positive footprint in this world through my words. My ultimate dream is to dedicate my life to soaking up as many culturally diverse experiences as possible and then writing about them so that they are accessible to as many people as possible, in an effort to hopefully bridge the gaps between populations and blur the divisions among all of us. By the end of my lifetime, I hope that this world is more cohesive, empathetic, and receptive than when I entered it. So in correlation with what I am doing by releasing this blog, I have chosen to make this post all about being fearless and being your own biggest supporter.

My entire life I have dealt with insecurities and the fears that come along with the lack of confidence. Throughout my life, there always seemed to be questions looming in the back of my mind of whether or not people around me genuinely liked me, and essentially I just rarely trusted that I was being positively perceived. Until college, I naturally never felt as though I truly fit in with people in my same age range and I could never seem to find that place in the world where I was truly accepted. I feel like that has played a large role in my anxieties with food, since it was one of the only things I could control and I could at least make sure that I “looked” good even if I doubted people liked what was beneath the surface. Recently, I started to feel old insecurities slowly try to creep back in, but then I remembered that I have the power, just like everyone else, to choose to be fearless and pave my own path.

I think what I am trying to say, is that as individuals, we have every right to love and support ourselves. Why can’t we act in ways that make us happy and say things we think are funny without feeling ashamed? Lately, the closer to my heart that I have lived my life, the more I have attracted people who genuinely care and want to be around me. Not only that, but my confidence has remained steady and therefore it is easier to ignore people who aren’t as openly accepting. Being confident in yourself is something that has the potential to transcend to a level of visibility, taking the form of a noticeable glow that almost acts as a protective bubble that only magnetizes positivity as you go through the ins and outs of daily life. It becomes easier to find happiness in even the smallest parts of life when you find contentment with yourself. When you have established that you have in yourself someone who will always love you, will always laugh at what you think is funny, and will always believe in your abilities and dreams, life becomes so much more manageable and carefree.

Essentially, life is not a competition and we have to choose to live our lives for ourselves. I know the topics that I write about won’t be accepted by all that read them, and I know that half the time people probably won’t even take the time out of their days to read my posts. But I have come to the conclusion that that’s okay, and I can’t be afraid of all the things that might go wrong, because what about all the things that might go right? If I impact just one person by being so vulnerable, I’ll be content knowing that I am one step closer to achieving my ultimate dream. I hope that everyone can look at themselves and see that they have nothing to fear in living life in whichever way makes them happiest, because at the end of the day, the scariest thought is to never have truly lived at all, or to have never at least given yourself the chance of being happy. The next time you question even the smallest of things, like whether or not you should smile at that person from across the coffee shop, challenge yourself to shed any doubts and actually follow through with your intentions. The worst that can happen is that you acknowledged the light and power within yourself, and the truth is, is that even though we might fall down a few times along the way, once we have discovered our own fearlessness, that’s when we will all be living our individual lives as close to our heart’s desire as possible.

Thanks for reading! I know I haven’t been as consistent with posting in the past, but I’m planning to put the energy into making this a big focus in my life from here on out!

Embracing the Essence of the Soul

September 30, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

As we emerge into this transformative time of the year, as it is not only one week into the Jewish New Year for some, but also one week into the transition of the autumn season, it is important to look within and evaluate what we hope to shed and gain in our lives. I personally feel that setting intentions is important daily, but it’s even more imperative during a time when the universal energy is in high support of an evolution, be it at the level of the world collectively, or at the level of the individual soul. Recently, I have been introduced to a lot of ideas about the soul and its purpose, the art of envisioning your ideals and actually achieving them, and forgiveness.

I always find it funny that often times the themes of life overlap, meaning that we can learn about a new idea and then it begins to pop up in various forms in other aspects of our life. One of these ideas is that of living our lives guided by our soul, rather than giving into the distractions of what our body might desire. According to Ancient Greek philosophers, the secret to ultimate happiness and a good life, is to listen to the soul. Everyone’s soul seeks what is truly essential to life: love, wisdom, courage, and justice. However, to be given the opportunity to go on such an enlightening journey, we are given human bodies, which have other desires. The philosopher Socrates says that this is often why people are prone to mental conflict, as we have both our soul and our body’s desires fighting to beat the other out. This can be solved though when we separate the distractions of the body from the truth that our soul speaks.

In lieu of this time of the year where we look towards who we want to become and acknowledge the characteristics we want to leave behind us, the ancient philosophers give us perspective on how to be successful in achieving our goals. For those of you who are familiar with the Law of Attraction (the idea that when we emit positive thoughts we attract physical prosperity in our lives, and the opposite when we are negative), this is essentially an earlier version of this idea. Dating back thousands of years ago, the importance of envisioning what you wanted something to be like and then working your way towards it, was vitally important. This is the spirit that built the great cities that we now learn about in textbooks, but it is also the spirit that the philosophers believed could be applied to an individual’s life as well. When we conceptualize the version of something that we hope to reach, we subconsciously align our actions in a way that effortlessly leads to the realization of this image.

Another important theme that helps us move forward in our lives and let go of what is no longer serving us, is the concept of forgiveness. I think this idea is fairly well engrained into our society in the aspect that we are all aware of it, but that we do not always remember to apply it. Lately, I have been letting go of things that previously upset me and realizing that I may not have the power to reverse upsetting things, but I do have the power to give my energy towards the positive things in life and dismiss the negative. I think it is important to note that forgiving ourselves is also crucial. When we love ourselves and realize that we are human and make mistakes, we lift off a weight that disadvantages us in our pursuit of what we truly desire in life.

With these three points in mind, I encourage you to take some time and reflect on what you hope to gain in the months ahead. Looking back, what do you hope to release and fix in the future? As you do this, reminding yourself to forgive and not wallow in the guilt or upset that certain things may have caused you. Set intentions and visualize what would make you the happiest, focusing on the positives with the viewpoint that you hope to achieve them, not that you don’t have them currently. According to the philosophers of ancient times, setting goals of what you want will change your perspective, and in turn will cause you to naturally begin to act in a way that will lead to the ultimate manifestation of your hopes. Above all though, these desires that you wish to attain should be desires that in the end will place you further on your journey to ultimate happiness based on the soul. As you take this time to reflect, clear your mind and listen to your heart and soul, what does your soul point you towards? By acknowledging the deeper longings within yourself, you can help to subside the temporary requests of the body. Honor yourself and take this opportunity to reign in the generative energy in the universe to help jumpstart your own transformation into an even happier phase of your life.

Taking Back Control Over Anxiety

September 08, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

This next post has been one I’ve considered writing for a long time, but it has taken me up until this point to feel like I have the complete courage and strength to formulate my feelings and experiences into words. I want to preface what I am about to discuss though, with the fact that although the majority of this will focus on food-based anxieties, I hope to express a message that can help with conflicting, internal anxieties in general. I can’t ignore the fact that I still worry and stress about many things in my life, but I can safely say that I know what it is like to experience the suffocating effects of feeling victim to your own mind even when you know it is “wrong” to feel so extremely about something.

Currently in my sophomore year of college, I feel like I have come a long way in my journey of self-love in the past year. For the past few years I have made fitness and health a large part of my lifestyle, which naturally comes with its ups and downs, but it wasn’t until my freshman year of college that I realized my focus on healthy living was becoming an obsession that would soon start to consume my life. I started off my college career coming off of a summer where I felt like I had achieved my best self to date, and I felt my momentum carrying through this new adjustment period as I would opt for healthy meal options and block out time for working out. As the semester progressed though, eating became a torment for me. No matter what I ate, even down to a cucumber slice, I would continually mull over the nutritional content (how much fat, carbs, and protein that I estimated to be in each component of my meal). I felt myself slipping away from being in the present moment, and instead giving all of my energy into factoring whether or not I would gain weight. This became every second, every minute, and every day of my life. It felt good to go to bed with my stomach growling because in my head that meant I was in a caloric deficit and would wake up skinnier. It felt good when at the end of the day I still had 200 calories I hadn’t utilized, even though my tracker was set to a goal of a meager 1,200 caloric intake for the day. If the scale was even a mere .2 pounds heavier than the day before, I would be spiraled into the idea that “I wasn’t doing enough” and that “I was getting off track.” I would even allow that small gain to metamorphose itself into actual “weight” when I would look in the mirror, convincing myself that I did look heavier than the day before.

Egg White Veggie Scramble + Julian's Paleo Almond Flour Bread + Apricots

I began to isolate myself from the college dining halls where I knew I would be judged for barely eating or only having a salad (plus it was depressing for me to watch people eat “whatever they wanted” and not feel the pain I felt), and I realized I was pushing away those who were close to me. It wasn’t that I wanted to, and looking back I wish I could have seen what I know now and acted differently, but I literally felt compelled to feel guilty for any morsel that entered my mouth. All the reassurance people gave me did help, and any time I was able to open up to someone about the truth of how I was feeling, it felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders since I was no longer sitting in calculative, hidden turmoil. This dilemma haunted me through my entire first year of college and even through my trip of a lifetime in Europe. It wasn’t until I came back from the trip and found out that I had actually lost weight and achieved my all time lowest weigh-in while traveling, that it hit me that I could manage to eat “unhealthy” things and not gain. I began to try to not hold back from enjoying life and approach eating with the tactic of having small bites of things I viewed as guilt-loaded so that I felt like I had tried them, but hadn’t completely lost control. Through a process of encouraging and coaxing myself, along with making tough decisions of when to restrain from my compulsion to weigh in or track my calories for the day, I feel like I finally am at a point where I have outweighed the control and am now on a better path to recovery. Every day is not necessarily perfect, and some days I feel myself starting to get overly analytical about what I’m eating, but I try to maintain power and not succumb to the fear that wants to seep in.

Nonfat Greek Yogurt Bowl topped with blueberries + strawberries + pecans + chia seeds + honey

What I hope to impart through sharing my experiences, is that it is okay to have anxieties. No one is wrong for feeling the way they do, and it can be frustrating to feel like you are alone in feeling a certain way, to feel misunderstood, or to feel like you are acting in a way you don’t actually want to be acting in. Whether it is an anxiety with food or a different type of anxiety such as feeling compulsive about everything being in an exact order, deep down inside we all have the power to take back control. I realize that many times this is easier said than done, but just know it isn’t completely impossible. I felt trapped in my own body and I knew I wanted to let myself eat and that there actually weren’t consequences if I did eat, but for some reason I couldn’t stand up to myself. It is definitely a process that varies for anyone battling with these similar feelings. One method that helped me was to slowly begin to recognize the feelings I had and then flip my perspective so that I no longer had fear about eating, but rather recognized that I was making conscious decisions that I was proud of. Rewarding myself for even the smallest of victories (like eating an M&M and not freaking out), helped to slowly untangle my compulsiveness to track and evaluate everything. Essentially, it becomes a balancing act of being aware of uncontrollable feelings and also easing up on them a notch, until it gets to the point where the power shifts to more ease over controlling feelings.

Plate of turkey + microgreens + jicama + avocado w/ Everything Bagel seasoning + Thai Curry Hummus + mini sweet peppers

The most important message from this, is that even when you think you are alone in feeling a certain way, just know that we are all human and someone else knows how you feel in a different capacity. It might not be the exact same situation, but relative to their life, you both might be experiencing the same types of feelings. Another point I’d like to make, is that it is okay to open up to people and receive help. I know I often feel guilty when I unload my feelings onto others and so I sometimes naturally close myself off, but I have often found that it leaves others around you feeling as if they have done something wrong. Believe in the power of yourself to make a change within, and don’t feel shame in acknowledging your feelings and letting others in to help. We are all beautiful and worthy in our own individualistic ways, and as we work towards complete love and contentment with ourselves, we will see even more beauty in the world around us.

Allowing for Imperfection

August 14, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration, Lifestyle

Although I continue to write about the importance of staying positive, I know that at times it can be hard to see the light in every situation that we face. Sometimes as humans we cannot help ourselves from feeling sad, distraught, discouraged, or hopeless. This post will aim at helping to overcome the tougher times in life and acknowledge our natural feelings.

We cannot always predict what life has in store for us; life is a journey of ups and downs. Even the most positive of people can experience the other end of the spectrum of emotions. When life throws something at you that evokes within you some sort of sadness, grief, confusion, or anger, it is important to not get frustrated with yourself. In my own life, if I find myself extremely distressed by something, I can sometimes fall into a pit of upset. However, it is important to keep in mind that we are inclined to react to different situations in certain ways, so in order to ease our experiences through challenging emotions, we must remind ourselves that such experiences are temporary and that we do have the strength to persevere. During life’s less happy times, the key is to acknowledge what we may be feeling, and with that, acknowledge that there will be more good times ahead just like there were before we fell into a more melancholy time. This goes along with trusting that we have divine guidance for our life path and that sometimes we must go through some tough times in order for life to fall into better place.

I think it is important to also recognize that although we might not always understand the situations we go through or feel like we have the power to persist, these are feelings that come naturally to most of us and we are not abnormal in any way. Even when it feels tough to stay positive and push through, just allowing ourselves to live out our validated feelings and knowing in the back of our minds that we have the potential to return to a life of optimism, is an act of staying hopeful. I know that often times it feels as though once one bad thing happens in life, things spiral into a pattern of negativity, but we must try our best to release the little annoyances and find the little things to be happy about.

The next time you are faced with a trying situation, don’t get frustrated with yourself or with life. Or better yet, know that your frustration is valid, but that it is not the only thing you can feel. Within us all is divinity that is there to guide us if we just listen and trust. I cannot stress enough how supported we all are, even when we are physically alone. Our souls all harness the energy and power of the universe that is available for us to tap into at any time. Life will throw what seem to be bumps and unfairness along the way, but we must look at life with multi-perspectives and realize that both the good and the bad times in life are temporary.

I would like to end this post with a mantra that someone very dear to me enlightened me with. It helped me heal in a time of unexplainable darkness that I truly did not ever think I would get out of, and regardless if you have ever resonated with the feelings of a deep depression, these words are an important reminder for all points in life.

“You are worthy because you exist, you exist because you are worthy.”

Engaging in Empathy

August 06, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

This next post builds upon the idea of not just being conscious of things, but also acting with feeling and intention. The other day it hit me that one of the key components that leads to a happier, smoother life is the ability to consider the feelings of others.

The human race is a species that thrives off of connections with others. We run our best when we are surrounded by love, care, humor, and joy, all of which work as a give-and-take cycle that can only be made possible with other people. With this in mind, if we go out into the world and only act with the attitude of “what’s best for myself,” we can cause harm to our cycle of reciprocation and begin to push away the people who provide us with what we truly want and need in life. We often forget to take a step back and reflect on the potential outcomes of our actions, not only for our personal sake, but also in a way that takes into account the effect we may have on someone else. I am sure that for many of us, the last thing we would want to do is to hurt someone, let alone someone who is close to us. That’s why, it is important to ask ourselves before doing something that could have a ripple effect onto another’s life:

“Will my actions affect someone other than myself?”
“Am I willing to take the risk and potentially, knowingly hurt someone?”
“If my actions do end up harming someone, will I regret it? Is this person’s suffering worth what I am about to do?”

Essentially, it is important to weigh out the potential benefits and potential consequences of the things we do and say. This is important to do even in situations that may have virtually no effect on others, because it is important to always be conscious of how our actions and words will influence the next step or moment within our life paths.

Considering others’ feelings goes further than it’s immediate benefit (because caring about others is SO positive), but it also can help in finding appreciation in your own life. For example, if you close your eyes and truly imagine what it might be like to live in a country where health care was not accessible or you had to walk miles to get drinkable water, you might be able to actually feel the intensity of real people’s situations. Imagining what they must go through, things like being exposed to sweltering heat, yet physically pushing themselves, or showing up to work each day despite battling the worsening symptoms of a serious health condition, can put our own lives into perspective. Compassion and empathy don’t have to go as extreme as considering the conditions of another country. It can be as simple as knowing that a neighbor down the street is dealing with a tragedy, becoming conscious of how they must feel, and then possibly going out of your way to show them the love and care that exists in all of us.

This brings me to another point, which is that through empathy, we act in a way that is positively perceived by others since they feel our care and kindheartedness. When others feel you exuding such lovingness, they too will act in a way of compassion towards you, refueling that cycle that I touched upon earlier. We should keep in mind though that the ultimate goal of acting empathetically is not to receive anything in return, as being selfless in and of itself is beneficial for the soul. Basically, when we think of other people’s situations, we should treat them in a way that we would hope to be treated if we were in the same situation, because later on when it’s our turn to be on the receiving end, our considerations will be reciprocated.

The moral of the story is that without empathy we cannot reach our highest potential. We need others in our life to help us live fully and experience the essence of life, and to do our best at maintaining such relationships, we must act from a place of love. We must act in a way that considers how those around us might be feeling, so that we can therefore do our best to align our words and actions in a way that will get others to a place of more love and joy, rather than of pain and suffering. Sometimes we make mistakes, and just because we may hurt someone near to us, does not necessarily mean that they will immediately stop showing the care and love they have for us. However, over time, if we continue to ignore the feelings of others and act in selfish ways that harm those around us, they may begin to pull away and shelter their tenderness for us.

The next time you hear of someone else’s situation or go to do something that you know will have an effect beyond yourself, take a moment and think of the emotions one might feel in response. Do your best to fulfill your own happiness, but try to lessen its expense on other’s happiness. Reach out and express your empathy whenever it is possible. As we journey closer to our own happiness, we must not forget about the value of the happiness of others.

Being Pleased with the Present Moment

July 31, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Inspiration

In today’s world it is so easy to get distracted by technology or lose sight of what is important. Sometimes it seems as if the likes on social media are more valuable than the personal interactions right in front of us. I recently read a quote that said:

“Nothing in this world is permanent, and we’re foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we are more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it.”

This quote really struck me when I first read it, but a week later, when I faced the end of a serious relationship I had been in, the words resonated with me on an even deeper level.

As always, I like to share the lessons and ideas that are currently inspiring me in my own life, because I know we are all human, we all experience the same feelings and emotions, and we can all often benefit from similar advice. I am taking this article back to the root concept of why I started this blog in the first place: gratitude. The idea is that we have so much to be thankful for right in front of us, and the more we show appreciation towards what we have, the more positivity we allow to flood into our lives. With the growing popularity of social media, our society has shifted to a more competitive and materialistic environment. It becomes easier for us to see all the possibilities that the world has to offer, it becomes easier to get lost in the idea of “what ifs,” and it gets easier for us to feel less abundant in our own lives. However, all of us have the power within to manifest a deeper energy and to center our focus on what we do have.

For example, I feel fortunate for my travels to Europe that I wrote about in my last post; I know that not everyone has the opportunity to travel and may never see the places I was so blessed to have seen. But situations are all relative, and someone who may see my travel photos and feel bitter towards me, should keep in mind that if they are viewing my photos, they must have some sort of technological device, and not everyone in this world has access to the daily luxuries that most of us take for granted. Yes there might always be someone who appears to be “luckier,” but there will also always be someone who is worse off than we assume we are. Everyone’s struggles are relative to their life situation and the things that they value.

This is why we can all find contentment in our lives, because we all have the strength and ability to shift our mindset and realize that we have things that deserve more appreciation than we often grant them. If we start by focusing on small things and reminding ourselves to acknowledge (either mentally or vocally), what we cherish, we will find that slowly our brain will begin to pick out the positives without us even consciously doing so. Eventually we can all get to a point where we are left with feelings of mostly happiness, since all the tiny things that we appreciate add up to an overwhelming feeling of gratification. Also, as we find ourselves enamored with all the good in the world, we positively charge our own personal energy that exudes onto others. This leads to a cycle of inspiration as those around us start to become more positive, even if it is just a smile in response to being surrounded by your optimistic energy.

It takes more energy to dwell on what we wish we had, than it does to feel thankful for what we do have. Plus, all that time and energy we spend focusing on negativity goes to waste, as we then have lost precious opportunities to have turned those moments of disappointment into moments of good memories. It is important to not get distracted in the multiple potential outcomes of a situation, but to actually live in the moment to the fullest. Some of the biggest regrets can be avoided by simply returning yourself to center and finding what there is to enjoy in the present.

If you seek for what you do not have, one day you might look back and realize that in that same moment that you were longing for more, you were ignoring so much you could have appreciated in that moment. Do not wait until you have lost those things and it is too late to go back. So as you move forward from this moment, remember to take any opportunities to voice your appreciation, find at least one aspect of each day to be thankful for, unplug from the diversions of technology, and detach yourself from preoccupied thoughts. With each passing day you shall find that there is more and more in this universe to be grateful for.

Chartering into the Unknown

July 09, 2017 by Alannah Paren in Travel, Inspiration

We all know the feeling: that flit of nerves mixed with the periodic wave of excitement. It comes as a natural reaction whenever we cannot mentally prepare for what lies ahead in our life paths. This post is inspired by my last summer’s unforgettable trip to the wilds of Alaska, a land with much to still be discovered.

The White Pass train chugged deep into the forests of Skagway, Alaska. I was a long way from home and I wasn’t sure what I was expecting to see during this over three-hour-long excursion. The fact that I was on a train was a miracle, because I have always had an inherent, yet unjustifiable, fear of trains. As the picturesque scenery sailed by, I tuned into the tour guide informing us of the pioneers who first trekked the land that was now before us. And that’s when I started drifting off into a new series of thoughts. The fact that people willingly decided to travel so far into the unknown amazed me. I realized that if someone could embrace the mystery of the future on such a grand scale, I could embrace the change that is to come in my own life.

I go through periods where I am super excited about what is to come and I realize it won’t be as bad as I previously thought, and then before you know it I have again fallen into a self-created tremor. Why is it that embracing the future can come in such a drastic range of emotions? I think sometimes the present is so good that we want to hold on to it forever, which can create resistance towards the potential of losing what we currently have. However, I have found that in being so upset over “what ifs,” we miss out on fully enjoying things when we do have them. Sometimes it isn’t even an external change that causes us to spoil the good things in life, but rather our own fear of ruining them that leads to exactly what we wanted to prevent.

I have grown to love the mantra, “Everything happens for a reason,” because it is so true. We all have somewhere we are supposed to be, we are all divinely guided if we allow ourselves to be. We need to shed the worry, fear, and paranoia, and let the faith, joy, and love flood through. We need to savor every second and trust that the unknown is only unknown to us, but that it has been scoped out for us.

All of us have the potential to be courageous when it comes to embracing change.